The Agape Tree: 2008

Mullets.

Michael Keaton, Luke Skywalker, Uncle Jessie from Full House... we've seen them all...

But why....WHY, I ask you, are they still around? The mullet isn't merely a hairstyle. It is, well, more like a state of mind...a..way of LIFE. Characterized by short hair on top, front, and sides, the mullet is then followed by a long drape of hair down the neck and back. Typical accessories of said hairstyle often include unkempt facial hair, tattoos, sunglasses, and 80's band t-shirts. Although research of this phenomena is still at an early stage, preliminary results by the nation's top laboratories have suggested that as the mullet slowly reaches its maturity, tentacles begin to grow into the brain of the victim, affecting several important areas of the brain. This then alters the actions and behavioural responses, causing extreme aggression, lack of hygiene, a sense of paranoia and distrust towards authority and governmental figures, but most importantly -steadily decreasing IQ levels. However, these details are merely preliminary and are nowhere near conclusive. Also, the controversial nature of this theory renders it unsuitable for mass publication.

I saw too many mullets today to keep count. That's not the saddest part though. ...most of them...were on women. In the hickestville of Indiana...a town of 654 people....mullets are all the rage. I invite all who have met discrimination for their chosen hairstyle to move to said town where you will be accepted with open arms.

...anyhow...the point of me going to this hickestvillemulletmetropolis was for the Covered Bridge Festival and, in turn, the fair food.

5 hours = 1 elephant ear, 1 sweet tea, 1 Italian roast beef sandwich, 1 bag of kettle corn, 1 Amish ice cream cone, and 1 corn on the cob

and 1 stomach...which may have grown a lil in the process...but now I'm home, fat, and free of mullets. ...until tomorrow...because...you just never know...

715 miles, 26.48 gallons of fuel, 23 bottles of water, 9 games of volleyball, 167 youth, 7 eligible males, 3 sweet teas, 2 Cokes, 1 bag of sunflower seeds...

Elkton Banquet 2008

Another weekend of matchmaking where only those with the true skill to hide...survive. However, despite the constant questioning of singleness and the ever nudge toward naive males...I really did enjoy myself.

With the girl/guy ratio being just sliiiightly tipped, (5 girls to 1 guy) you could say we had an interesting weekend. I'm proud to say the drama level low and I only threatened one guy with a squirt gun.

Of course...no trip is complete without a classic picture of my feet. I'd have to say that I spent most of my time in Kentucky barefoot, which is obviously the way to go. In fact, you don't even see those so-called "no shoes, no service" signs down there. I have to admit though, I really do like the South...people are just friendlier. I do wish I had taken a picture of the sign that had pointed to Dairy Queen as the only tourist attraction. Yah, you read that right.

My lil brother Mooch and I at the banquet...we match. Unintentionally. Sorry ladies, he's taken. The banquet was an...interesting experience. The room was so small...and the congestion made me want to sing 99 bottles of hairspray on the wall...

Question: Can you die from hairspray inhalation?

Even Barack found some time away from the campaign trail to chat it up with the youth. Bro. Daniel Andes preached the banquet service and Noah got stuck leading songs for a very uncooperative audience. A really funny moment was when Bro. Daniel got a hair dryer and a ping pong ball out for a demonstration of the power of the Holy Spirit. hahaa...when he turned that hair dryer on..those kids acted like they just saw someone bungee jump from the Eiffel Tower. oooooooooh!!!! Um...yah...air does that.

Ruth on the left, Lisa in the red, Sarah in the pink....thats all I know...

Seriously, there were so many girls...and so very few guys. But everyone seemed to have a lot of fun. I did feel like one of the oldies. So I stayed mostly in the shadows...where I can do my deeds in private...

Me, Bekah, and Jessica cheesin it up. We...didnt do the whole prom dress thing. I mean, THAT was pushing it as it was...for me anyways. And I think I wore the $30 heels for a total of 5 minutes before I went barefoot...yet again. Seriously, whats the point? You buy the dress if you're lucky to find one that fits and doesn't make you look like some Hawaiian fruit. THEN there's the whole making it decent thing....a shirt underneath...a sweater to go over it. And dont even get me started on the shoes. Seriously? Ever heard of youth canoe trips?

I love this girl, Megan. She was SUCH a sweetheart. And she's not all that far away..I think. Anyhow...I found her on facebook and I'm just so glad to find a girl who's not...all...uh...girl.

These young men are just so nice looking...I HAD to take their picture. Too bad they're all like...15. hahaa...

I DID CATCH THE CAP FLYING OFF! We spent a lot of time putting our empty water bottles to use. You twist it around the middle (while the cap is on) and once you reach the point where you cant twist it any longer...you point it AWAY from people and slowly twist the cap off. And POW! I'm somewhat easily amused...

Daniel and Seth...North Carolina boys. Good kids. It just wouldn't be right NOT to include them on my blog.

Me and my banquet buddy Tyler. Tyler sat next to me at the banquet...he's pretty cool. Funny thing is, the 20 yr olds at our table lit more things on fire with the candle display than this kid did. All HE did was eat the chocolate candies on the table.

Interesting story...You can see that Willie here is wet. You can also see that Isaac has a bottle of water in his hand. While I was distrac-...er...I mean TAKING Willie's picture..Isaac was seizing opportunity...You should click on the picture to get the full affect. It's worth it. I especially enjoy Isaac's grin while he does it.

A few of us on Monday morning before we left...
And no...I'm not naming them all off...By the time noon had hit..most people had left. Those of us who stayed managed to get a few good games of volleyball in though.

Franso and his friend Thomas wrestling. Thomas was one of 7 kids in his family (i think). He was so well behaved....even if he did attack Franso with a new weapon every ten minutes. I think Franso just..fascinated him.

Brittany and Kimberly. Kim was part of my "girltalk" group on Thursday when I got down there. Funny how girltalk has nothing to do with girls and everything to do with boys. I arrived on Thursday and spent a few hours helping the Raymonds throw cracked drywall into a truckbed. Gotta build those muscles up before the banquet ya know...

James...grimacing...
One great thing about James is he's always ready to pose. come to think of it...I'm not sure how to take that...
We had to have had 20 of those plastic bottles going off...